Sealed with a Scottish Handshake. Her and I have never even kissed. Would have been awkward to do that on our wedding… and weird.
Four herbs on four sides of us, at each of the cardinal directions.
Angelica: Inspiration, magic
Mugwort: Tranquility, happiness
Sassafras: Foundation, considered choices
Violet: Humility, devotion, faithfulness, forgiveness
Opening
Halloween has its origin in ancient Celtic harvest festivals; it was believed that at this time of year, the veil between this world and the next becomes permeable, and spirits may wander into the world of the living–as we may also peer into the life beyond death. We may have to placate mischievous spirits–giving them candy when they come to our doors, say, promising to trick us if we don’t–as we celebrate the abundance of the harvest by bobbing for apples.
A similar tradition in Mexico, Dia de los Muertos or Day of the Dead, not only acknowledges those who have gone beyond, but welcomes them back for a visit with their living scions, arranging an altar (or ofrenda) with soap and water so they can refresh themselves when they arrive, as well as offerings of food, tequila or pulque (a fermented cactus liquor), flowers, bread, sugar skulls, and chocolate (and who wouldn’t return for that?) It is a happy and reflective time, a time to meditate upon as well as celebrate the legacies of those who have gone before.
Tonight we gather to create that legacy, a bond of love that will ripple forward into the future and touch many whom we cannot now imagine. As they will honor us after we have gone, so let us now bless those yet to be as you walk together into the future and all that lies beyond, forever joined at heart and hand.
VOWS:
Look upon your beloved and repeat after me: **[Name], I take you to be my lawfully wedded (husband/wife). I vow to love you and care for you as long as we both shall live. I take you, with all your faults and your strengths, as I offer myself to you with my faults and my strengths. I will help you when you need help, and will turn to you when I need help. I choose you as the person with whom I will spend my life.
EXCHANGE OF BANDS
When we marry, we encircle each other with our love, our hopes, and our wishes for protection and happiness. Like the circles we inscribe to create a magickal space, we declare our marriage sacred ground, a living breathing circle created as we intertwine on both sides of the veil.
You have chosen to symbolize this encircling of your hearts and souls with these bands, which I ask you to bestow upon each other now as a token of your consent and promises for this marriage. Wear them as a badge of your love for each other; may that love and these gifts bring you strength, safety, and joy.
JOINING OF RIGHT HANDS (Scottish)
In early Scottish custom, betrothals were legally sealed with a handshake, a gesture of honor showing acceptance and support of the marriage bond being made.
Through time this gesture of taking right hands grew in significance, coming to symbolize the promise of love between a bride and groom and their pledge of faithfulness, comradeship, and eternal union. Our culture has become familiar with this image through the iconic claddagh, with its joined hands, heart, and crown, representing friendship, love, and loyalty.
[Names], please face each other and hold hands, looking at them so you may see the gift that they are to you.
These are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and vibrant with love, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as you promise to love one another today, tomorrow, and forever.
These are the hands that will work alongside yours, as together you build your future, as you laugh and cry and share your innermost secrets and dreams.
These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, for a lifetime of happiness.
These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes: tears of sorrow and tears of joy.
These are the hands that will comfort you in illness, and hold you when fear or grief wracks your mind.
These are the hands that will give you support as you encourage one another to chase down your dreams. Together as a team, everything you wish for can be realized.
And lastly, these are the hands that even when aged and wrinkled will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch.
May these hands you see before you this day be blessed. May they always be held by one another. Keep them tender and gentle as they nurture each other in their wondrous love. Help these hands to continue building a relationship rich in caring and devoted to one another. May you see these four hands as healer, protector, shelter, and guide.
Pronouncement:
Forasmuch as you have consented together in wedlock and have given and pledged vows to each other, and have declared your unity by joining hands and exchanging rings, by the authority vested in me by the State of California, I now pronounce you husband and wife.
